Space for Brabus

Love..love Fort Minor…I can’t believe I just heard about them now.  Thank you, Mery, muah muah.  I guess Mike Shinoda is right… Job hunting is 10% luck, 20% skill, 15% concentrated power of will, 5% pleasure, and 50% pain…P-A-I-N in the ass!!

I was never really fond of sport, since there are always the possibilities of more pain and humiliation.  I based this on my experiences, such as tripping on a running treadmill and getting hit on the head by a basket ball…I am just one clumsy dork :-p  What I dread the most is group sport.  I was always the weakest link on the team, the "special child" who needs extra protection or who just simply isn’t fast enough. Although this is the fact, I am proud to say that I never get picked last for the team *grinz*.

But then, life itself is one big sport.  And all my life, I was always the last one to get picked for the team…The last one to grow up, the last one to let go, the last one to get a job, the last one to get a boyfriend… I always believe that humans are social beings.  We need friends, families, boyfriends, girlfriends, partners..we just need accompaniments.  Even though we all have our own separate life, we always feel the need to belong, to be loved.  I have always been surrounded by supportive friends and families.  However, when everyone in my life starts to put their life together…I guess I can’t help it, I become the last one to be picked for the team of LIFE again.

Thus I wonder…If I don’t want to repeat this ugly cycle again, maybe I should just stop trying to play the game.  If only I can do that, everything would be just peachy…

2005 has just ended.  The first half of the year was a good one for me, full of promises, friends, and fun.  The second half was more like the pit…which pretty much was summed up by Linkin Park: "I tried so hard and got so far, in the end it doesn’t even matter"

So so so….it’s 2006 already.  What now then? This morning, my sister and I came back from our trip to Boston and NY….and I found out that I am officially broke *LOL*.  Several things that I know lurking around the corner just kinda blew up out in the open today…making me feel stupider (is this even a word?…ah, my english is getting worse too) and weirder.  The symptoms are all here: laziness, daydreaming, and butterflies in my stomach.  And this is just the beginning of the year…hopefully things will get better…I mean it has to be, right?

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2006 EVERYBODY….HOPE THIS YEAR IS BETTER THAN LAST YEAR